When I was just starting my PhD, the University I attended did not actually offer a PhD in my field. My department (M.S.) was in the process of getting a PhD program approved but I needed to declare immediately. The only other “similar” option was Ecology and Evolutionary Biology. I needed to contact a person there and I called their office Secretary. She gave me the woman’s name and number.
Being naïve and dumb, I should have Goggled or searched her name to see with whom I was dealing. Instead I cold called her AND called her by her first name, as the secretary had done. BIG MISTAKE. She ripped me a new one, something like “I have been a professor here for x years, I have earned my PhD, I am published around the world, and so It is Dr. Soandso.” It was way more snotty, evil than that though. It was so harsh and I was so unprepared, it brought me to tears. I went immediately to my major professor and told him about what happened. He agreed to let me stay undeclared for a year and skip the whole “having to deal with her”.
I thought she was such a witch. A feminazi, sanctimonious, hard-core biotch. 8 years later, I still kind of feel that way BUT now I have some perspective.
I am a young PhD-level lecturer at a large University. I am (so I have been told, ha!) “hipper” than most of their matured, older professors. I talk to them, not at them. I make jokes. I am very energetic.
In my classes, I immediately introduce myself as “I am Dr. X, and you can call me Dr. X”. It works and they do. A clear line drawn in the sand. The graduate students are a different ball game. Even though they are often only 1 year out of their undergrad…they think they are my peers. I have several situations where they talk to me as if we are sitting at a bar…and even have had some back talk, eye rolls, etc.
What to do? I would never want to come across as a sanctimonious witch with too high of an opinion of herself.
I consulted my older, wiser boss. I assumed his genial manner and grey hair would preclude him from this behavior. Wrong. His opinion was to just make the statement “Please call or refer to me as Dr. X.” Clear line. If they get annoyed, so be it. It just feels so…snotty. He believes the clear line keeps issues and problems at bay. I see his point but ugh. It is a struggle for me.
